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Why your question is NOT "urgent" or an "emergency"!

Asked by Walter Roberson on 22 Feb 2012
Latest activity Commented on by Image Analyst on 28 Aug 2014

Recently, many posters have indicated that their Questions are "Urgent" or "Urgent, Help Immediately", or even an "Emergency". This frustrates the volunteers immensely. The volunteers do the best they can in the time they have available, and it is emotionally overloading to be asked to "jump" on to problems at the expense of their personal lives and other duties. It is also not fair to the other people asking questions when people try to push in to line ahead of them.

I, for one, am getting positively cranky about the constant demands for "urgent" help. I am overwhelmed by the "urgent" requests, and I am not being polite about them.

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The below is a collection of some of the responses people have made on the topic of "urgent" or "emergency" questions:

"urgent adjective

1. compelling or requiring immediate action or attention; imperative; pressing: an urgent matter."

So basically you are saying that this is sufficiently important that I should cancel my appointment that I have been waiting a month for, and pay the $150 cancellation penalty, because it requires IMMEDIATE action? Is there an international crisis in automated ball detection in cricket that YOU personally were chosen to solve on a day's notice? Will there be riots in some countries if you are unable to solve it in time?

  • Urgent is when the nuclear reactor containment system is about to collapse. Or when I've run out of chocolate.

Note: I am not a consultant, and I am not employed or contracted by MathWorks or any related company or organization in any capacity.

Disclaimer: I did receive a baseball-style hat from MathWorks once.

  • I like the questions with emergency, urgent and help as subjects. It makes me want to see how ridiculous the question is. It decreases the quality of my answer.
  • Urgent matters like this should probably be raised as support cases.
  • Urgency does not make the impossible possible.
  • My parents told me when I was able to speak: "Never shout "help" if it is not urgent. Urgent means: The sox your are wearing are burning and severe harm is imminent. If you do not wear the sox currently, it is not urgent, such that there is enough time to shout "my sox are burning in the cupboard" instead of "help"."
  • If your government has not asked the Canadian Embassy to contact me, then this isn't an emergency.
  • If you post that something is an "emergency" then you should be able to document that there was a literal and immediate risk of loss of life, or at least of serious and literal risk of damage to health (e.g., a broken leg.) If emergency officials such as ambulance or fire department or police or doctors did not get involved, then it was probably NOT an emergency.

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Every day, I receive numerous email messages marked as "Urgent". If you would like your Question to be treated with more respect than I treat these, then marking your posted question as "Urgent" is strongly advised against.

For example, the below message was quickly sent to the Great Recycle Bin In The Sky:

Hurry now and claim your fund from the Central Bank of Nigeria or your fund will be confiscated by the wicked officials of the CBN. [...]

5 Comments

archana on 3 Mar 2014

completly agreed with your words n will definatly correct myself cordingly..... thanks a lot

Andrew Reibold on 27 Aug 2014

I agree with everything.

Except the spelling of socks. :)

Image Analyst on 28 Aug 2014

Really? Even the (mis)spelling of "you're" right after sox?

Walter Roberson

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8 Answers

Answer by James Tursa on 1 Mar 2012

Is there a way for TMW to make this post PERMANENTLY appear as the very first post? Or for TMW to scan all new posts for the words "urgent" etc. and redirect them to this post before allowing the new "urgent" post to go through? Just wishing ...

0 Comments

James Tursa
Answer by Sean de Wolski on 22 Feb 2012

Just a thought: you could come into Answers with the -urgent tag searched:

http://www.mathworks.com/matlabcentral/answers/?term=-urgent

2 Comments

Oleg Komarov on 22 Feb 2012

Empirical evidence!

Walter Roberson on 22 Feb 2012

The terms are showing up in the titles and contents.

I am the person who has added most of the "urgent" tags, upon specific use of the word in the Question. It is useful as a tracking mechanism, to help assess what does or does not get answered quickly (or at all), and to see how often people are using the term.

Sean de Wolski
Answer by Walter Roberson on 28 Feb 2012

I get the urge sometimes to edit the "Urgent"'s and replace them with other words, but I haven't found quite the right words yet.

.... Please help, it is very very Ostrich

.... Xanthodontous!! Image magnitude!

.... Cognitive radio question. Extremely topiary!

Suggestions ?? This question is very bort!

6 Comments

Walter Roberson on 28 Feb 2012

Lemme think... "Urgent" is an adjective, so we don't want to substitute an adjective just in case the result seems to make some kind of sense. To emphasize the "noise" of "urgent" we want a word variety that cannot fit. Such as a noun or a verb.

I was going to propose that we use the nouns (only) from the famous poem, "Jabberwocky" -- the invented or totally obscure ones. Those are: bandersnatch borogoves jabberwock raths toves wabe

On the other hand when I look at the list, it is much sparser than I expected: most of the interesting parts of the poem are adjectives.

Still, I expect that exclaiming, "Oh, borogrove, man, borogrove!" would perhaps be a bit less contentious than "Belgium, man, Belgium!"

Bjorn Gustavsson on 29 Feb 2012

Bort! Bort is a Swedish word meaning: away, removed, rid, delete. I find that absoluteley ideal. Others might find other similar words in other languages preferable, but "bort" is good!

Walter Roberson on 1 Mar 2012

Without going into details, I have found out that in some languages, "bort" has a meaning that is not acceptable for this usage.

Walter Roberson
Answer by Jan Simon on 31 Mar 2012

I'm using a limited urgency scale:

Level 1: Somebody should polish the silver.
...
Level 10: My socks are burning.

Imagine I'm working on the computer and my wife plays with the kids. One kid has performed something really bad, e.g. plugged her head between the posts of the steel handrail. Shouting out loud: "Jan, come, it's urgent" would increase the panic level of the child with the known unwanted side-effects. A friendly and calm: "Jan, visit us in the staircase, urgency level 7" will be much more target-aimed to catch my attention.

Here in this forum the situation is different for me. Whenever somebody uses the term "urgent", I'm convinced that he or she does not want a fast answer from me, but most likely from Walter.

1 Comment

Walter Roberson on 31 Mar 2012

These days I only answer "urgent" questions if I am bored. I barely read them. I've been getting my Recommended Daily Allowance of stress from other sources, and so haven't needed to supplement it by dealing with "urgent" questions.

Jan Simon
Answer by Oleg Komarov on 22 Feb 2012

..and you're being polite.

I will link your post on the tutorial.

0 Comments

Oleg Komarov
Answer by Andrew Newell on 22 Feb 2012

Just for curiosity, has anyone seen a genuinely urgent question?

1 Comment

Walter Roberson on 23 Feb 2012

Many "I will fail my assignment / honors-project that is due in 3 days / tomorrow / 2 hours", but those I would refer to more as being "Time Sensitive" rather than "Urgent".

There have been a very very small number (two?) of Questions which explained the reason for their time sensitivity and asked for expedited responses in a manner that I personally thought was reasonable under the circumstances ("a grant proposal deadline just fragged us; we can go with what we have but it would be great if someone could suggest a better way").

Andrew Newell
Answer by Melissa on 9 Mar 2012

First off, I wish to thank all of the volunteers who help those of us who really need it. I also would like to apologize for those who feel that their procrastination or superior complex makes the need for "urgent" postings.

0 Comments

Melissa
Answer by Matteo Niccoli on 12 Mar 2012

Emergency: please urgently read my tweet about this at: https://twitter.com/#!/My_Carta/status/179213958543183872

(a.k.a. I really like you posted this Robert, good reminder in addition to an entertaining read). I will post it on all my social media

0 Comments

Matteo Niccoli

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