Matlab jokes or puns
Chad Greene
on 18 May 2015
Latest activity Reply by Image Analyst
on 12 Sep 2023
Are there any good Matlab jokes? I don't mean why or any other Easter eggs, I mean good jokes involving Matlab. Actually, that bar may be a bit too high. Any jokes, good or bad, let's hear 'em.
632 Comments
matlab is the joke
Younger generations will appreciate this.
Where do MATLAB Online programmers store their files?
In the wordcloud.
I am a Bit Late
for i = 1:10
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end
You can't handle the truth!
Sure you can:
the=@true
In persian (Farsi) Matlab means "content" and could be interpretted as something related to literature. During the second year of my bachelor's degree, I saw a course in my schedule called "Matlab", as I was an electrical engineering student, I thought this is probably for those interested in literature, and skipped the first 5 lectures....
oops. :)
A physicist, a matlab programmer and a firefighter are invited to a social science experiment. Everyone spends a week in a completely isolated room with only a table, chair, paper and pencils. There are also 2 small stainless steel balls on the table.
When the physicist comes out of the room after a week, all the sheets of paper are written and the pens written completely empty. His notes are reviewed and he receives the Nobel Prize.
When the Matlab programmer comes out of the room after a week, all the sheets of paper are also filled with Matlab code and the pens are completely empty. In addition, he has written code on the walls. His notes are checked and he receives the Fields medal.
After the room has been renovated, the firefighter is left in the room for a week. After a week, the room looks impeccable - the pile Paier and the pens are unused and everything looks like the first day. Only one of the two stainless steel balls is missing and the second one is broken. When asked, he says, "It was not me!"
its not too late - my english is bad and google is good, but still not perfect. Thanks for the hint.
"I was not!"
???
Was this translated from "Ich war's nicht!"? If so, then the best matching English idiom would be "It wasn't me!"... otherwise it must be too late at night and I just don't get it.
A comment that I frequently find useful when answering questions about MATLAB.
Eat a programming elephant one byte at a time.
There are 10 kinds of people in the world. Those that understand hexadecimal and F the rest
Q: What does your cat do when it sits on your laptop?
A: It plays with strings.
Italian Mafioso #1: Why "input" the name never of nagging wives ?
Mafioso #2: cause, Not enough input arguments.
^_^
Short Lovestory: MAT was in love with SIM and he spent many "words" to prove it , but SIM "blocked" them. The End
wrldtrv
traveling around the world~
Terrific polar bear!
while I_was_young
pause(100 years);
end
:)
one day, a girl asked to a boy: MATLAB matlab kya hai? Is it called capital matlab? the boy fainted! and she was from electronics background! Can only be understood by Hindi-speakers!
I'm not sure how to vote
)
:)
La F!
Q: want to hear a chemistry joke?
A: K
Q have time for another?
A: Na
Go!!! MATLAB Central Scavenger Hunt
Are you cold? Because you can stand in the corner..where it's 90 degrees!
She >> You don't love me anymore...
Engineer >> What, What are you saying... why?
She >> Tell me then.. Who is that "matlab" that you mentioned while you're sleeping ...
She >> No, "Matlab", she is my assistant in work. In addition, she is married to "Simulink" since 1984.
Engineer's Wife >> ok
bar(flip(sort(rand(1,2))))
what is the answer # 10? ^^
mat-lab ^^
Why did the chicken cross the road? -To make the matrix dimensions match
what do you call a mat in the laboratory? ... MATLAB
where is the joke?
What do you call a dog that is good at math? A mat-lab.
>> help fun
fun not found.
Oh poor Matlab can't find fun :(
Fun is converting all .m function files to .p and then deleting those functions on someone's PC. :P
The fact of Family tree in MATLAB!!!!!!!!!!!!
an icy beauty :)
SK.Farabir Ahmed comments,
I think the spy command added later ,By NSA .That is why you found it on R2013a ver .
11 cheers for binary!
INCONSOLABLE -Duuude. I wrote her my love in a m.code. -And so? What happened dude? -Forgot a semicolon ):
Soren Jorgensens
The name Matlab comes from two undergraduate students in a dorm inventing Matlab. One of them was called Matt. The other said: 'Hey, Matt, labourious work, there, heh?' Ant it was compiled. And they rejoiced.
Not sure how to vote on these forums, but good job on the puns!
Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination
There are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
Why is grid function worried??
Because there is a plot against it !
In India: Matlab is can be speak as મતલબ.
Jus cos you tan, doesn't mean you should. It's a sin ;) :) #JokesForMatlabSwag!
In Egypt : Matlab like female name Mahitab So, when someone asks do you like Matlab I reply 'Matlab or Mahitab'
Deaf mathematicians communicate through sin language.
A novice MATLAB programmer flying in a hot air balloon over Natick Mass suddenly realizes he's lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below (an engineer) says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this parking lot."
The balloonist sighs and says "You must work in the MATLAB Answers department,".
Surprised, the engineer replies "I do. How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man on the ground replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault."